Jaspis Collection
by AnonymousMiscell
Summary: Jaspis oneshots I have written and will add to. Open to prompts/requests!
1. She Can't Take A Hint

**Hi! This is a collection of Jaspis Oneshots for all you Jaspis lovers out there:3**

 **Some of these will be connected, this one is connected to the next chapter.**

 **This first one is A COLLEGE AU from Lapis' POV. Enjoy.**

 **She Can't Take A Hint**

Unfortunately, I happen to be at the receiving end of every bad thing the world could possibly throw at me.

And I mean _everything._

But out of all the things that could be going wrong right now, this one involves being at a restaraunt waiting for someone who was supposed to be here TWO HOURS AGO.

Yes, you guessed it. _I'm being stood up._ _Fan-FUCKING-tastic._

And what's worse: the waiters and waitresses keep walking past me with pitying faces. And one even has the nerve to walk up and ask if everything's okay.

While in the process calling me _sweetie_.

 _I am Lapis Lazuli, and I don't want to be here anymore._

I smooth my blue hair away from my face and stand up, pushing the chair in.

I'm about to walk out the door when someone says,"Hey."

I turn around and look. A tall woman with long messy whitish blonde hair is standing a few yards behind me. She's wearing the same uniform the other workers are wearing... _gods, her curves_...but no apron. In fact, she's slipping on a leather jacket like she's about to leave... _hiding her beautiful curves...AHEM._

I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear and cross my arms. "What?"

She walks closer, slowly, and I get a full view of her face. She has light brown eyes, tan skin, and plump, pouty lips... _gods don't look at those..._ that are drawn up in a smirk. "Are you the one who was stood up?" Her voice is deep and rough, but fits her. It doesn't sound too _boyish_ or too _girlish_.

What is she _talking_ about? "I AM being stood up. Now if you'd excuse me, I have to go home and study." I say, turning around, about to open the door, when an arm reaches over my head and opens it for me. "Thank you." I snap, not meaning it as she follows me into the chilly night.

"Study for what?"

I groan inwardly. "Exams."

She's still following me. I'm about to scream," _WHAT DO YOU WANT, WOMAN!?"_ when she bursts out," Do I have those?"

"Of course, if you're in college." I honestly don't know why I'm still talking to her.

"What, did you think I went to secondary school?"

 _No, I thought you went to preschool._

"Name's Jasper Scarlet Brooks." she says.

I think she was expecting me to start gushing about her, because she's finally stopped talking and is looking at me expectantly.

"Um...who?"

She frowns. Crosses her arms. "I know you know me, Lapis Lazuli."

 _How did she know my name?_

"And don't be surprised that I knew your name, I work there, I know the names of everyone who comes in and out of there." She gestures to the restaraunt.

"Oh." I pause. "Then who are you?"

She hisses. "If you don't know, then you don't care...and if you don't care, why SHOULD I tell you? Christ."

"Look, lad-er-Jasper, I pretty much live under a rock when it comes to famous people, so don't blame me for something I didn't know." I say, crossing my arms.

She bows her head. "That's fair." She looks back up at me, the smirk completely gone from her face. Her... _admittedly beautiful_ face.

Oh gods, shut up, brain.

She reaches into her jacket pocket and throws a roll at me. "Catch, brat. You gotta be hungry."

I catch it with two hands, then look back up at her. "Er...thanks."

"Don't mention it." she says, raising one hand in a sort-of wave. "See you soon." she says, turning around and walking away.

My gaze follows her until she disappears around the side of the building.

The golden diamond shape from the front of her uniform shimmers at me in my mind's eye.


	2. Room Mates Suck

**Again, this one is connected to the first chapter. Enjoy.**

 **Room Mates Suck**

"Why are you holding a roll?" My room mate, Jenny, asks, looking up from her phone. "You could've just asked me to make us a pizza."

"NO!" I say. "NO PIZZA!"

"Mm...why not?" she asks, examining her nails. Then she shows me something on her phone. I have no idea what it is. "Don't you just LOVE it?"

"Jenny, it would be more helpful if you had given me a second to actually SEE the screen." I honestly couldn't care less though.

"They're these new earrings. Aren't they pretty? They're gold with tiny gems on them." She squints. "It says it's genuine tiger's eye." Then she looks at my hand again."L, you're going to kill that roll if you keep holding onto it. Why do you still have it anyway?"

"Um...this annoying girl threw it at me." _It's the truth, though._

"But if she was annoying, why would you...?" Jenny looks at me, very confused. Suddenly her phone rings. She yells,"Oh, COME ON!" And stomps out of the dorm, saying,"But _Daaaad!"_

 _Thank the gods._

Our sides of the dorm are very different; mine is themed in dark blue, with paintings of sea creatures adorning the walls. The wood of my bed is white and creamy, the bedspread is blue (obviously) and one small silver hand mirror is on the white nightstand.

Jenny's side, however, is themed in red and black. There's a bulletin board covered in sticky notes (half of the ones that are placed there usually end up littering the floor) and ads for her dad's restaraunt, "Fish Stew Pizza". Then there's heavy metal posters on the black walls, and one of them is cut through with the black wood of her canopy bed.

The only thing our sides share is the TV in the middle, and really the only things that are watched on it are rock concerts, when Jenny can't go out to see them, oceanography documentaries (me), or some cheesy soap opera, that neither of us really want to watch but end up crying by the end of it.

I sit down on my bed, rumpling the blue covers, still staring at the roll. _Seriously, why do I still have this? Just because she has pretty curves and the most kissable lips you have ever seen? It's not like you'll ever see her again._ I think about my second question. _I don't think her curves are beautiful. And her lips aren't kissable._ I draw in a breath, then guiltily shake my head. _She's pretty._

I lift the roll to my lips and take a deep sniff. It smells like cinnamon toast, kind of. I take a bite.

Okay, only a small bite. But when I take it away from my mouth, I see white sticking out of the bread. _What the..._

I pull the white paper out, sort of reminding me of a fortune cookie, and unfold it.

 _ **Call me, brat:**_

 _ **555-2651**_

 ** _You need to learn about famous people._**

 ** _-No X's OR O's: JSB_**


	3. Don't You Forget About Me

**High School AU!**

 **Don't You Forget About Me**

Cobalt eyes narrowed on the group at the other end of the room. Her sparkly blue nails dug into her palms, and she gritted her teeth.

 _She_ was over there, talking to those friends that, after and even _during_ football games shoved her into lockers and janitorial closets...and what was even worse was that _she_ never realized that the owner of those cobalt eyes was gone.

Whatever it was, Lapis Lazuli had had enough of it.

She stomped over, fists still clenched, and tapped on her shoulder. "Jasper? A word?" she said, as calmly as she possibly could.

"Which one, Mrs. Quartz?" snorted one of the other girls, nicknamed 'Eyeball'.

"WE. ARE NOT. MARRIED. AND JASPER!? A WORD. NOW." Lapis hissed, glaring at them all.

"Wow. Someone's a bit on the tipsy side. How'd you even pick this one up, Jasp?"

The tall girl answered,"Meh. I don't know."

Lapis reached out and roughly grabbed Jasper's arm. "NOW."

"Haha, you gonna get a room for the full-blown porno that's about to happ-"

"AND YOU. SHUT. THE FUCK. UP." hissed Lapis, pointing at Eyeball.

Eyeball crossed her arms and muttered,"Sheesh."

Jasper said,"Okay, let go, I can just follow you..."

"NO."

Lapis dragged Jasper all the way to the girl's locker room, on the other side of the building. She shoved Jasper into a bathroom stall, and despite the fact that there wasn't enough room for both of them, she squeezed herself in.

"Lapis, why are you being mean?"

"Because of you and your stupid friends." Lapis said, crossing her arms.

Jasper looked at her, one eyebrow raised. "What about them?"

"Oh nothing, except for the fact that they shove me into lockers and janitor's closets and leave me there! And I have this feeling that you know that I am in there...and you don't do ANYTHING!"

"Lapis, I swear I had no idea-"

"AND THEN, when someone asks how we met, you say,'Meh, I dunno'! DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT TODAY IS!?"

"Happy birthday?"

Lapis' eye developed a twitch and her teeth were bared, cheeks bright red in anger. "GAH! NO, JASPER! TWO FUCKING YEARS WE'VE BEEN DATING, TODAY!"

Jasper pursed her lips."I'm sorry Lapis...I'm just...not good with dates."

Lapis started laughing maniacally then, and Jasper backed away, worried for Lapis' sanity. "EXACTLY! You're NOT good with dates, you idiot!"

And that was when Jasper's eyes started to narrow."It's not my fault, brat. And don't you DARE call me anything other than my name."

"You don't scare me, you...big fat fucking jerk! Oh, did I say JERK!? I MEANT WHORE, SLUT, BITCH, HO."

Jasper picked Lapis up by the collar of her blue shirt and brought her to her face. "You want me to be those things!? Fine."

Their lips met, but the kiss was more one of intense hatred rather than love.

But suddenly Lapis stopped and pulled away. What was she _doing?_

It wasn't Jasper's fault she had forgotten everything.

She had an odd memory loss problem, and that, paired with multiple extracirricular activities, gave her little time to spend with Lapis. And her friends were her teammates in almost everything, and despite the fact that they pretty much worshipped Jasper, they still needed to hold their friendship, or else the teams would fall apart.

"I'm sorry…" Lapis whispered.

Jasper's eyes were still narrowed, but she set Lapis back down on the tile floor, crossing her arms.

"I forgot about your memory problem."

Jasper's eyes were narrowed for about three seconds more before she managed a small smile."Guess you're the one with the memory problem now."

The class bell started to ring, and Lapis opened the stall door, letting herself and Jasper out of the cramped space.

"Happy Anniversary, Lapis."

"Right back at you, you big dummy."

Jasper laughed and shoved her playfully into the wall. Lapis tried to do the same, but couldn't budge Jasper. She gave up.

"See you later, if we can hang out." Lapis said, sheepishly waving to Jasper.

Jasper scooped her up and hugged her tighly, gently kissing her forehead. "We do have some catching up to do."


	4. My Best Friend is The Knife

**My friend Jasper-Quarts wanted some Jaspis fluff, where Jasper has some bad habits and Lapis catches her during a dark time and tries to help her.**

 **These are the bad habits: the main one is cutting, the minor one is nail-biting.**

 **WARNING: SUICIDAL THOUGHTS AND CUTTING.**

 **My Best Friend is The Knife**

Out of all the inaminate objects Jasper could have as best friends, she chose the knife.

Her silver one, the one that she used whenever her roommate was gone from the dorm, whether she was stressed or not.

It became a regular thing for her. Sure, maybe one wasn't supposed to commit suicide, and sure, maybe one could get sent straight to Hell for it.

But Hell had to be better than being _alive._

Tonight Jasper was particularly stressed; there was a rumor about her going around campus. Supposedly she was transgender, according to some jerk named 'Chuck'. _Amd even if I WAS trans, what's even wrong with that!?_ she thought, slamming the door behind her before punching the wall.

It left a large hole, and Jasper's knuckles stung.

She sat down on the couch, debating whether or not she should fix the hole.

Then she felt the pain in her hand, and she wanted more of it, wanted more of that pain.

She pulled the knife out of her wallet and held it up to the artificial lights of the room. It glittered welcomingly at her, seeming to whisper " _I'm your friend. Play with me!"_ over and over.

Just as she made the first deep cut in her arm, the door swung wide open, and Jasper was so startled she almost fell off the couch she was sitting on. She dropped the knife, which made a loud clattering noise on the hard floor.

Jasper's roommate, Lapis, stomped in, blue hair in a craze, arms crossed, clearly pissed. "JASPER! WHY DID YOU PUNCH THE WALL?!"

Jasper clutched her bleeding arm, trying to obscure it from view."L-lapis! I thought y-you were out!"

"I forgot my checkbook." she said, walking right past Jasper and towards the kitchen table.

Jasper watched Lapis looking for the blue-leather covered checkbook. After a minute she looked up and glared at Jasper. "Could you be useful, Jasper, instead of laying around like a couch potato? Help me find this stupid thing!"

Jasper breathed out a sigh of relief. Good. She hadn't noticed the cuts or the knife yet.

She stood up and walked over to where Lapis was looking, lifting up magazines and mail and bills.

Finally Lapis found her checkbook.

"Finally!" she yelled, starting to walk towards the door. Suddenly she turned around and narrowed her eyes at Jasper.

More specifically, her arm.

It took about .5 nanoseconds for Lapis' face to change from angry to worried. "...Jasper? Are you...?"

Jasper sighed in defeat. "Okay, yes, Lapis, I'm cutting myse-"

"I thought you cleared that problem up last year!" Lapis yelled, slamming down her checkbook and walking straight over to the couch. She grabbed Jasper's arm and inspected it, including her hands. "Jasper, you're still chewing your nails, too!"

The taller woman looked guiltily at her arm, a tear running down her face. "I-"

"You have a reason to live, Jasper, if you didn't you wouldn't be here! Don't cut yourself. What about your team? What about your friends and your family?" Lapis then murmured quietly,"What about me?"

The statement wasn't intended to be heard, but Jasper heard it. "What do...you mean?"

Lapis blushed bright red."Jasper, I'm confiscating your knife until you stop trying to die. I've had enough of my friends lost to that and I don't need that to happen to you."

"Why do you care about what happens to me? Last time I checked, you hated me and wanted nothing to do with me."

"Last time you checked, then, was a year ago." Lapis said, carressing Jasper's hand. " _I have a crush on you."_

Jasper turned bright red. She started to bring her fingers to her mouth to chew on, but Lapis got to her mouth first, firmly pressing their lips together.

When they pulled apart, Jasper asked,"You sure acted like you hated me just now, with me punching the wall."

Lapis rolled her eyes. "JASPER, YOU LEFT A HOLE."

"I know."

Lapis sucked in a breath and switched back to the original subject. "But seriously, Jasper. Please don't cut yourself. Or chew your nails."

"I won't. I just had a bad day."

"Tell you what. I'll stay here instead of going shopping for once. I'll need to watch over you."

"No, you really don't-"

"Yes I do."

Later that night, Lapis fell asleep on top of Jasper, whose arm was bandaged.

The knife had been thrown in the trash can.

 **I dunno, did I go too far or stay too far in the safe zone? Tell me in the reviews.**


	5. Watch Your Back (literally)

**My friend Jasper-Quarts also requested this one: a fic where Lapis is being bullied and Jasper beats the shit out of the bully :D**

 **High School AU!**

 **Watch Your Back (literally)**

Sure it landed her two days of out-of-school suspension.

Sure it made her unable to play in the basketball tournament.

But it was worth it for _her._

 _Her_ being _Lapis Lazuli,_ the most beautiful girl she had ever seen.

 _Earlier..._

Jasper had just gotten the form that would enable her to play in the annal basketball tournament at school. Basketball wasn't her _favorite_ sport; her favorite sport was football, but football wasn't open to girls...so basketball it was.

She walked along the halls, whistling the Camp Pining Hearts theme song, until she heard loud crashing inside the girl's bathroom.

Jasper continued to walk, thinking it was just some stupid gay couple going at it, but she stopped whistling and walked noticably slower.

And then she heard a yelp.

She looked inside the bathroom and saw Sugilite, a tall football-loving freak like herself, standing over none other than Lapis Lazuli.

Jasper's cheeks burned, and she found herself continuing to watch.

"What the fuck!? Are you even a GIRL, string bean?"

Lapis crossed her arms over her chest. "Just because I don't have what you have doesn't mean I'm not a girl."

"Heh, yeah right. Come on, ALL girls in the tenth grade are supposed to have at least SOME bust. Your chest is as flat as a guy's." Sugilite hissed, crossing her arms.

Jasper felt herself turn hotter, not just because Lapis was there now. She dug her nails into her palms and whispered to herself that she would intervene only if and when it was necessary.

"But that doesn't mean I AM a guy!" sputtered Lapis.

Sugilite didn't even listen. "And look at that skinny ass. You have nothing in the curves department, there is NO WAY you're fem."

"BUT. I. AM!" yelled Lapis.

"Shut UP, BRAT!" Sugilite yelled back, shoving the shorter girl with so much force she slammed into the wall fifteen feet away from them.

Jasper was fuming, taking deep breaths. _If she does anything else, she better hope her sorry ass that her mom has enough money to pay for the hospital bill!_

But Sugilite still didn't see Jasper as she growled out,"If you tell anyone about this, brat, I'm going to kill you. So don't run off and tell your mummy, because after you do-" Sugilite made a slicing motion across her throat.

Then Jasper blew over.

"YOU BETTER TAKE BACK THOSE WORDS, SUGILITE!" she growled, jumping out of her hiding place.

Lapis, from her place on the floor an inch away from the opposite wall, opened her eyes. Her head hurt.

Jasper picked her up and whispered in her ear,"Are you okay?"

Suddenly, there was a harsh tug on the hood of her jacket. She set Lapis down and turned to Sugilite, cracking her knuckles."She's not your brat." growled Jasper, crossing her arms, while standing protectively im front of Lapis.

"Well then, if she's not a brat, then I guess the name ugly little bitch is a bit more suiting..."

Jasper wasn't sure what happened next; all she remembered was flying forward and punching Sugilite a bunch of times.

After that she was lying on the floor in a bloody heap.

Then Jasper had picked up Lapis and carried her all the way to the nurse's office.

Yet somehow, she was still suspended for three days.

 _Present..._

Despite the fact that she was unable to play basketball, one good thing came out of beating up Sugilite: Lapis started talking to her.

And it didn't seem like it would take long for the two to go further up then the friend zone...and up to the romance zone.


	6. Music, Music, We Adore You (not)

Nyehehehehe, this chapter was fun to write...you'll see why...

*cough cough*nikki*cough cough*minaj*cough*sugilite*ahemhemhem*Anaconda*cough*

Sorry...i have a bad cough today. ;)

 **Music, Music, We Adore You (not)**

As soon as I walk in the apartment, this is what I hear:

 ** _'MY ANACONDA DON'T, MY ANACONDA DON'T, MY ANACONDA DON'T WANT NONE UNLESS YOU GOT BUNS, HUN'_**

"Um...Jasp...er..?"

 _ **'OH MY GOSH, LOOK AT HER BUTT, OH MY GOSH, LOOK AT HER BUTT, OH MY GOSH, LOOK AT HER BUTT, LOOK AT, LOOK AT, LOOK AT HER BUTT...'**_

Then Jasper sprints past me, screaming,"OH HELL NO MAKE IT STOP SAVE YOURSELF LAPIS!"

I stomp back to our room, where the song is coming from, and see Sugilite, one of Jasper's friends, messing with her phone.

 ** _'PUSSY PUT HIS ASS TO SLEEP NOW HE CALLIN' ME NYQUIL-"_**

I snatch the phone away from her and pause the song. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!?"

She tries to snatch the phone back, but her size hinders her. She gives up aad stands up from our bed, walking away, long black hair swishing behind her. "I was just having some fun with J, Mrs. Quartz." she says, slamming the door behind her after saying,"Later, dyke."

 _Dyke?!_

 _She's_ the one who just said she was 'having some fun with J'!

Jasper walks back through the door. "Yeesh. She needs to learn to not play 'Anaconda' around me."

"Why do you hate it so much?" I ask her.

"Because later, that's all I'm able to think about, and I end up singing it during a job interview!" she sighs.

"Um...ok-Jasper?"

Her weary gold eyes flick to me.

"She just said she was just having some fun with you, is that true?"

Jasper frowns and throws a pillow at me.

 **Oh, Lapis. Making sex jokes.**

 **This chapter was to kind of lighten up this fic, as I have been told it is kinda dark.**

 **So yeah, thank you Anaconda.**

 **-JGD**


	7. The Perks of Being A Rock (Part One!)

**Lapis has some unhealthy obsessions.**

 **Jasper fulfills her fantasies.**

 **Sort of.**

 **Kinda M-rated, but not really.**

 ***does it count if someones about to have sex but gets interrupted? I'm gonna say no, if they haven't taken any clothes off or anything.**

 **The Perks of Being A Rock (Part One!)**

 _ **Lapis**_

Lapis Lazuli had an obsession.

While most gems were obsessed with the things they were made to do, Lapis was obsessed with her captor.

It was completely unheard of. Jasper was the kind of gem that _could_ and _would_ smash something to pieces if anything got in her way.

Not to mention Jasper was _her captor_ and was dragging her back to Earth, the planet she was stuck on for thousands of years and absolutely hated.

But some part of Lapis just couldn't hate Jasper.

And she was tired of being ignored by the buff gem.

Thankfully there was no need to keep her in one of the cells. Lapis didn't want to only be able to see Jasper out of a destabilizer field.

 _ **Jasper**_

She didn't realize one could get so tired of mint green.

Yet she was.

Probably because everything on the ship was mint green besides her and the blue water brat Lapis.

Jasper didn't really think much about Lapis, except for when she caught Lapis checking her out (which happened quite a lot, actually).

And here she was now. Jasper could hear her soft padding footsteps over her own heavy ones.

"J-Jasper!" Lapis yelped, almost falling over at the sight of Jasper.

 _Why did that look staged?_

Jasper brushed it off."Hey brat, where are you going?"

Lapis looked down at her feet."I don't know," she mumbled,"it doesn't matter, anyways."

Jasper crossed her arms."Then if you aren't going someplace, why does it look like you are?"

Lapis' face turned dark blue."Well, I heard some weird noises, and I thought something might be wrong with the ship, so I was...going to ask Peridot if something was wrong..."

Jasper rolled her eyes and sighed."Well I was going there anyway. Let's go, brat." She grabbed Lapis' tiny blue hand in her own large orange one and started to drag her in the direction of the control bridge.

Suddenly she felt literal chills break out across Lapis' skin, and she let go, staring at Lapis.

Lapis' face was so blue it almost matched her hair. It only took a couple of second for Jasper to figure out what was going on.

" _Oh._ "

Jasper turned all the way around and her golden gaze met Lapis' blue one. She licked her lips and felt her cheeks glowing in the mint green light of the ship.

Without another word, Jasper grabbed Lapis by the wrists and pinned her to the mint green wall, leading her on in a messy kiss.

She had no idea how that had happened; one minute she was calling her 'brat', and the next minute, they were kissing, tongues in each others mouths and all.

And suddenly she was undoing the ribbon at the back of Lapis' blue halter top.

Just as she got it off, a nasally voice with a mint green source rang out from the entrance to the bridge. "JASPER? LAPIS!? What are you DOING?!"

Lapis quickly tried to tie the ribbon while Jasper backed as far away from Lapis as she could to show she was not guilty.

"Ahem, nothing." she coughed. "Let's-uh- let's-" But Jasper couldn't form a sentence. She covered her cheeks and walked away.

Lapis crossed her arms."What are YOU looking at?" Then she walked off to find Jasper and possibly resume what they had started.

Peridot was left there, truly wondering what they were doing.


	8. The Perks of Being A Rock (Part Two!)

**Nightime Philosopher requested some clingy Lapis!**

 **The** **Perks of Being a Rock (Part Two)**

A few days had passed on the ship since Peridot had caught Jasper and Lapis going at it.

Thankfully they were able to finish what they had started, but now Peridot was more suspicious of those two. They would disappear for hours at a time, coming back looking dissheveled but happy. Peridot didn't think she had ever seen Jasper look so un-grumpy. Then, she would see Lapis clinging to Jasper like Jasper was a giant teddy bear.

Back on Homeworld, any gem of lower rank that talked to, touched, or even looked at a Quartz soldier would be smashed into dust immediately, and Jasper was no different, if not worse. So seeing Jasper not beating up Lapis was a very shocking sight.

Right now, the two gems had locked themselves inside a cell guarded by a destabilizer field, which might not have been the best idea, but at least they could have their fun.

It was surprising that Peridot couldn't hear them; Lapis' moans were so loud they could have woken the dead (if gems could 'die', of course).

After they both had their fill of 'fun', they decided to take a much-needed nap. Lapis laid her head on Jasper's now-red-and-purple chest, and Jasper wrapped an arm around her, closing her eyes.

They didn't say anything for hours, just slept.

Then Lapis was woken by Jasper sitting up suddenly.

"Where are you going?" asked Lapis.

Jasper raised her eyebrows."Lapis, we're on this ship for a reason, and it's not just to have fun."

Lapis stood up and grabbed Jasper's arm. "I'm going too."

Jasper rolled her eyes."I wasn't going to leave you anyway."

They both phased their clothes back on, and Jasper did the best she could to cover up the marks on her neck and chest.

When they got to the bridge, Lapis had by then commanded Jasper to put her on her shoulders. So when they walked in and Peridot saw them, she looked at them with more confusion than ever.

"J-jasper? Lapis?!" then, when she got over her shock, she crossed her arm and glared at them."Alright, what's going on? I know you clods aren't telling me something."

"Psh...not telling you something? _No, never._ " Jasper said, waving the statement off and setting Lapis down, who immediately grabbed onto her bicep, looking up at her with large blue eyes.

"See?!" Peridot yelled, gesturing to Lapis."She's never acted like that before until that one day you..." her eyes narrowed. "YOU..."

"I what?" asked Jasper, wrapping an arm around Lapis. "I was getting handsy? Because yes, yes I was."

"'Getting handsy'? What does that phrase mean?" Peridot asked.

The two gems blushed.

Then Lapis pulled on Jasper's arm."Can we go back to the cell now?"

"Yes...and if Peridot wants, she can come watch." Jasper said, face completely straight.

Peridot turned bright blue."I don't want to know what 'getting handsy' means, then, okay!"

But when they got back to the cell, they didn't 'get handsy' at all...all they did was sleep.

But this time, Lapis was the one with an arm around Jasper.

 **I'm really not good at writing clingy characters, unfortunately, but you know.**

 **-JGD**


	9. My Secret Identity

**This chapter is not connected to the last two.**

 **I honestly have NO FUCKING CLUE what I was thinking during this, but hey, I just HAD to write this one :3 It pretty much sucks in my opinion, so please, no flames :( obviously.**

 **Lapis is the desperate twenty-year-old who FINALLY meets someone she likes on a dating sight and decided to meet them.**

 **Jasper is the totally gender-fluid person who is totally fake in the real world (fake name, fake gender identity, and fake sexuality because of parents) and is totally REAL on the Internet.**

 **Haha. Is Jasper literally me in this oneshot? XD**

 **College AU! :3 I sorta altered the lyrics to the song 'Lapis Lazuli' during 'The Message', just so you know. I didn't ruin it though, it's still good I guess ;)**

 **My Secret Identity**

She was pretty on her profile, with long blonde hair and unnaturally beautiful yellow eyes and tanned skin striped with vitiligo.

She was flawless.

She was.

And when she said she'd meet me at the restaraunt, I almost would have died if it wasn't for my room mate, Peridot, who started blaring the Camp Pining Hearts theme song.

Her name was Jasper, Jasper Beryllium Brooks. She was 21, both liked AND hated by people but never felt neutrally about, pansexual, and gender fluid (though she thought being called 'they' was weird and preferred to go by female pronouns). She just seemed so much more real than any other people I had met.

But she was nothing like me.

So I was surprised when she didn't deny my request to meet her at The Crab Shack tonight. ME, a swimmer with fake blue hair, a nail-biting problem, and acne scars. ME, a girl who could pretty much touch anything and ruin it. Me, the one who still wore old Pokemon-themed sweatshirts of Pikachu and Eevee (Evee?).

Maybe I seemed real to her too.

Then my phone starts ringing.

 ** _'She was trapped in a mirror,_**

 ** _and it couldn't be clearer,_**

 ** _she wanted to leave this place,_**

 ** _and get herself back in space..._**

 ** _Lapis Lazuli..._**

 ** _Lapis Lazuli...'_**

I pick up the phone and answer it.

"Hello?"

The person on the other end chuckles. "Hey, Lapis."

That would be my best frenemy, Pyrite. Just great.

"What do you want?" I bite out, turning off my laptop after closing all the current tabs.

"Oh, just wanted to see if you needed a ride to the Crab Shack tonight. That's all." she says, and I can see her in my mind's eye: smirking, smirking, and smirking some more, probably watching South Park at the same time as she's talking to me.

"No."

"Please? Cinnabar will be back tonight, and she's always really mean after she's visited her boyfriend." she whines.

"No."

"Lapis!"

"Fine."

She cheers.

"But don't you DARE embarass me in front of Jasper, you idiot, or else I WILL destroy you."

"Oh," she whispers creepily,"I won't."

"Pyrite, what's that-"

She hangs up.

"-supposed to mean. Okay, Pyrite, we're doing THAT again, then?" I mumble to myself.

I roll my eyes. The annoying little asshole.

I stand up from my chair and go to my closet...should I wear a dress or pants?

…

…

Pyrite shows up at my door at six sharp.

Surprising, she's on time for something for once.

As I walk past her with a dead expression, I see her face fall a bit.

And then I see it...the faint flash of yellow in her eyes.

Was I imagining it..?

…

…

When we arrive at the restaraunt, I expect her to just let me out and drive away, but no, she gets out and walks inside the Crab Shack, holding the door for me.

"Er...thanks."

She walks up to the lady at the cashier and says,"Is the table for Brooks, table for two, finally available?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Thank you!"

When she turns back around, she winks at me.

Then she grabs my arm and pulls me towards the bathroom.

"P-PYRITE!" I yell. "That's it, what's going on?"

She undoes the bun her hair is in and shakes it out, it falling down to her lower back.

Then she turns around after wiping her face with a paper towel. "Recognize me?"

Holy shit, she looks just like...

"Pyrite, you're Jasper?"


	10. Elementary School Field Day

**Elementary School Field Day**

"Sack race? Tug 'o' War? BINGO? What, is this an elementary school field day or something?"

Lapis Lazuli rolled her eyes as her girlfriend, Jasper, looked at the camp flier.

"Jasper, that's not even the camp we're _at."_ she muttered, snatching the flier from Jasper and pointing to the second one on the list.

"Hm." Jasper muttered, shooing away a fly buzzing by her ear and studying the flier. "Archery or riflery, wood carving, painting, fire-building, canoeing, kayaking...horseback riding..?"

Lapis huffed."Yes, Jasper, and obviously hiking, since we have to go up and down this hill to the cabins every day."

Jasper nodded.

"Does it say anything about swimming on there?" the blue-haired girl asked, kneeling down to tie her shoes.

Jasper studied the flier."Yep." She smirked at Lapis and said,"You have something sexy you wanna show me?"

Lapis blushed as soon as Jasper said that and looked nervously to the side."No, Jasper."

"You sure?" asked Jasper, a disappointed look on her face.

"Yes."

They continued the walk up the hill.

Suddenly, Lapis' shoe untied. "Aw, crap." She bent over and started tying them.

"Nice ass."

"Shut-sh-shut up!" yelled Lapis, standing back up, shoes only half tied.

They continued to walk.

 **Sorry this one was so short, that was really all I wanted to write for this: Lapis is just asking questions about camp, and Jasper keeps being a horny jerk.**

 **BTW, PEOPLE: I'd be the horny jerk.**

 **Tell me in the reviews if you'd be the horny jerk too. XD**

 **-JGD**


	11. Old Spice, Arm-Muscle Stretches, etc

**Old Spice, Arm-Muscle Stretches, and Some Very Lewd Thoughts**

Lapis and Jasper went to the gym every week, at least twice. They would have a routine: Lapis drove them there, Jasper walked away to the other section of the building without saying goodbye, and Lapis was left to pay for the membership, then to go to the pool.

But since Jasper's recent discovery of Lapis' lack of muscles, she had been forcing the swimmer to go with her.

And Lapis couldn't say that she minded very much.

"Hurry up and change, brat. We don't have all day." Jasper growled, crossing her arms across her chest in annoyance.

"Sorry, Jasper, I guess I'm not used to you rushing me." Lapis hissed back, trying to sound tough for two reasons: both to impress the bodybuilder, and to get her off her back.

"Blah blah blah. If you're really that annoyed, show me." She challenged, uncapping her Old Spice deodorant and rolling it on.

Lapis glared at Jasper but didn't do anything except put on her shirt.

"Coward." Jasper chuckled, ruffling Lapis' hair playfully. "I'll be at the door when you're done."

"Sure, okay."

Lapis walked Jasper walk away, starstruck.

Jasper. Had just. Touched her.

Sure, it was on the head, but that was _something,_ wasn't it?

Yes. Yes it was.

Lapis blushed and grabbed Jasper's deodorant, 'Amber', and rolled it on, then went to the door, where Jasper was waiting.

"Took you long enough." she said, opening the door and walking through before holding it open for Lapis.

Lapis walked under her arm and into the actual gym area.

"Alright, brat. First thing you gotta do is stretch, then you can do whatever you want." Jasper said, cracking her knuckles.

This was Lapis' favorite part.

Jasper raised her arms above her head, and stretched.

Lapis did the same, but watched as Jasper's shirt rose up, revealing a small strip of her stomach. The blue-haired girl licked her lips and looked down at her feet, face bright red, switching arms.

She almost started crying as Jasper brought her arms to her sides and the strip of stomach disappeared.

But that wasn't even her _favorite_ part.

They did a few more stretches, all of them boring, and then came Lapis' favorite...

...the one where they bent over and tried to touch their toes.

She tried, really tried, not to stare at Jasper's ass, but it took so much effort she actually felt her face burning.

Or maybe that was just her blushing.

She just, honestly, wanted that ass in her face, no...ON her face, and wanted the taller woman screaming for her to let her come...

Lapis stood up straight and shook her head to clear the thoughts from it.

She was there to stretch. Not to ogle someone. She was there to stretch. Not to ogle someone.

"So..." Jasper said, walking over to Lapis, hands on hips... _beautiful wide curvy delicious hips..._ and smirked."Why're you so red, Lapis? You look like someone used your face as a feminine hygiene product."

 _Aw fuck. She noticed._

"Blood rushing to my head," she blurted out.

Jasper frowned."You weren't down for THAT long."

Lapis face-palmed.

"Yo brat, you've been looking at me this entire time, you're acting like I haven't noticed."

Lapis pursed her lips.

"And for the record, Lapis, I've been looking at you this entire time too."

 _Huh?_

"And if you don't believe me right now, will you believe me if I do this?"

And right in the middle of the gym in front of everyone, Jasper kissed Lapis with as much passion as their height difference (and the laws of modesty) would allow.

And Lapis knew that in a few hours, the probability of her fantasies coming true was high.


	12. Lost and Found

**Guys, remember, you can request anything for a oneshot. And I MEAN anything, now that I am officially changing this rating to M.**

 **This one is something I just randomly thought of. I dunno.**

 **Lost and Found**

Lapis felt many ways about the orange quartz.

She felt obsessed.

She felt enamored.

She felt addicted.

She felt _whole._

But she wasn't there.

Lapis _missed_ her, despite the fact that their relationship... _Malachite..._ was full of hurt and hatred.

She felt angry.

She felt hatred for herself.

She felt scared.

She felt _lost._

But Lapis wasn't lost.

But that's what she felt like...she felt like she had lost her mind because of Jasper...lost every grip on sanity she had left...and she felt _empty...alone._

She wasn't lost when Jasper was there.

She wasn't insane when Jasper was there.

She was _found._

Lapis hated Jasper.

She wanted to destroy her, to tear her limb from limb from her body until she was safe.

She wanted to shatter her.

She wanted to be with her.

She wanted to be fused again.

And Lapis couldn't deny the ugly truth...

...despite all the hatred she felt towards Jasper, she _loved_ her.

She loved her with all her nonexistent heart, but not the way the Ruby and the Sapphire loved each other...some sick love that felt addictive, and obsessive, and wrong…but completely _right_ at the same time.

She wanted to feel all of her under her blue fingers, wanted to punch her and kick her and kiss her all at the same time...wanted to be Malachite. Wanted to sadistically state to her dark-orange striped face that she liked holding them together, trapping them at the bottom of the ocean. Trapping _her_ at the bottom of the ocean.

And suddenly Lapis wasn't Lapis anymore and Jasper wasn't Jasper...they were Malachite, they were one. They knew all of each other's weaknesses, secrets, strengths, and feelings. Jasper and Lapis didn't exist.

Only Malachite existed.

Only Malachite and finding Jasper mattered.

Finding the piece of her that was torn away when that arrow went throw Malachite's chest.

If Lapis didn't...she would never be whole again, she'd just be a broken blue gem.


	13. Why'd You Leave Me Behind?

**Jasper-Quarts requested a fic where Lapis finds out Jasper commited suicide...**

 **...and to be honest, I'm going to make her find out in the worst way possible...**

 **sorry, friends.**

 **WARNING: SUICIDE AND VERY MILD GORE**

 **Why'd You Leave Me Behind?**

They had had a fight.

It wasn't a _terrible_ one, in Lapis' opinion.

In Jasper's opinion, however, it had been. She had never heard Lapis yell like that before, she had never heard Lapis yell at _her_ in general until that day.

And it sent her running all the way back home for four miles, tripping and tearing holes in her jeans.

And when she was finally home, she had decided to end it all...

 _Lapis_

She knew they needed to talk about it.

But was it a good idea to call then?

Knowing Jasper, she was probably using a high-schooler as a personal punching bag right then.

So Lapis decided that NO, it was not a good idea to call then. She slipped her phone back into her pocket, not worried about anything. She crossed the street and entered the restaraunt.

Maybe she could apologize over a nice dinner..?

…

…

She finally called Jasper two hours later.

The phone rang three times before it went to voicemail.

Lapis frowned. Jasper always answered her phone. Did she deop it while she was running away?

She tried calling again. Maybe Jasper was still mad at her.

Voicemail.

She left a message this time. "Okay, Jasper, stop it with the games, we need to talk."

It took about five more unanswered calls for her to realize that something was really wrong.

She walked to her blue car, which was conviently parked right by her, and jumped inside, starting it.

She'd check home first.

…

…

"Jasper?"

She slowly walked inside the house, almost tiptoeing, scared of what she might find.

It felt kind of like a scene out of a horror movie, and she shivered.

She looked in the den first: nothing.

Then she looked in their room.

Then she looked in the kitchen, the closets, and the spare bedroom.

But there was nothing there.

There was only one room left to check: the bathroom.

The door was closed.

The door was only closed when someone was using it, so Jasper must have been in there.

"Jasper?" she asked, tapping on the door. "Jasper, can you open the door?"

Nothing. No sound, no door opening.

"Jasper?"

She waited for a few more minutes, then rolled her eyes. "That's it, I'm getting the spare key."

She got the key off the top of the doorframe of the bathroom and slid it into the lock, twisting it a few times before the door opened.

The bathroom was pitch black.

She turned on the lights and looked around.

There was the bucket they used if they were sick, and it was full of vomit.

That's what they entire bathroom smelled like...except there was another smell...it was more faint then the smell of stomach acid.

She turned on the fan in the bathroom, hoping that the smell would fade.

Then she heard bath water running.

Jasper never took baths.

She sighed. "Okay, Jasper, open the curtain, we're done playing hide and seek."

She waited for Jasper to open the shower curtain.

"Okay, fine, ignore me. If you don't I will." She grabbed the curtain. "One…two…three…"

She yanked the curtain away and screamed almost immediately.

It WAS a scene from a horror movie.

She immediately turned off the water and grabbed Jasper's limp bloody hand, trying to find a pulse.

 _No._

"NO!" she yelled, and with surprising strength, she pulled Jasper out of the shower, dragged her out of the bathroom, and into their bedroom.

She whipped out her phone and dialed 911, all the while stroking Jasper's hand.

"911, what's you're emergency?"

"Sh-she's dead..."

"Calm down, ma'am."

"S-sorry...2651 Homeworld Court, Beach City..."

Lapis couldn't hear anything else, now, besides the buzzing in her ears.

She dropped the phone beside her and stared down at her dead girlfriend. "Why'd you leave me behind..?"

She stared at Jasper. Despite how creepy it was to see a bloody hole in someone, she stared at her anyway, combing her fingers through her hair, wishing that her tears could heal her.

But it didn't work.

No wishing in the world could bring Jasper back.

She heard faint sirens in the distance.

"I love you..."

 **I'm so sorry guys!**

 **I don't know WHAT happened to make me write that sad mess.**

 **I guess I'm very twisted..?**

 **Jasper-Quarts: I hope you liked this, I hope this was what you wanted :3 :(**

 **Fun Fact: I actually started crying**

 **Trust me, the next chapter won't be as dark :3**

 **-JGD**

 **PS: for some reason i enjoyed writing this XD**

 **I'm evil**


	14. Pregnancy Is Worse Than Everything

**Nyehehehe, okay:**

 **Gem Egg Hell, requested by ThePastReliesOnMemories!**

 **I'm expierienced with reading Gem Egg Hell, but not writing it (wih the exception of this one Jaspidot fic I wrote back in August...ahem.) so sorry if this really isn't that good..:3**

 **Also Peridot is being a fucking doctor what the hell...Jasper is pregnant :3**

 **Pregnancy Is Worse Than Everything (except Rose)**

Jasper knew from expierience that pregnancy was worse than everything, with the exception of Rose Quartz.

In Peridot's words, it was 'clod-making', and Jasper was starting to agree...these eggs were becoming real pains in the ass.

It was just because of a stupid mistake, and that was falling in love with Lapis Lazuli, the one who dumped the eggs on her.

The worst part about it was not the aches and pains that stretched infinitely each day…the worst part was her not being able to control her body and her actions.

More than once, she had felt the urge to randomly start crying, and that resulted in both Peridot and Lapis asking her if she was okay and if she needed to _sleep._

Like at this particular instance.

"Lapis?"

"Yes, Jasper?"

"Am I a big baby?"

"Wha…?" Lapis looked at Jasper with concerned blue eyes.

"Answer my question." Jasper barked, a bit of her old self showing through.

"No, Jasper, you're not a big baby." Lapis answered, combing her fingers through Jasper's messy white hair. "Are you sure you don't need to..."

 _...don't say it._

"...sleep?"

Jasper sat up in the chair and folded her arms, turning away from Lapis. "No, no, NO! WE ARE GEMS, LAPIS, WE DON'T NEED TO-" Jasper uncrossed her arms and made air quotes,"-SLEEP!"

Lapis raised one eyebrow, then grabbed Jasper's arm."Okay, Big Baby, you're going to sleep." Lapis pulled Jasper out of the chair, and the orange gem clutched her midsection.

"OW! Lapis, don't...pull me up so fast!"

"Maybe if you agreed that you needed some sleep, I wouldn't have had to do that!" Lapis muttered, attempting to pull Jasper out of the bridge and down the hall.

But Jasper planted her feet firmly on the ground and picked Lapis up by her tiny arm, holding her close to her face. Lapis tried to squirm out of Jasper's hold, but failed. "What was that, brat?" Jasper asked, folding her free arm over her stomach, as the pain had gotten much worse now that she was standing up.

"N-nothing!" the blue water gem stuttered, turning her head so as not to have to look at Jasper's eyes, which were currently radiating anger.

Jasper narrowed her eyes. "Are you sure?"

Lapis nodded.

"You seem very suspiciously scared, La-OWOWOWOW!" Suddenly she dropped Lapis and grabbed her stomach, gritting her teeth.

Lapis stood up, walking over to the doubled-over Jasper, concerned."Uh, Jasp..er?"

Jasper's breathing was sharp, despite the fact that she didn't need to breathe. "Ow.." she muttered, tears of pain running down her face.

"Do you want me to get Peridot?" Lapis asked, wrapping an arm around Jasper's shoulders.

"Y-y-yeah..." Jasper mumbled, hiding her head in her knees, rocking back and forth.

…

…

All she could see were muddled colors then…the pain was blinding her. The crotch of her suit had gone damp and liquid was leaking out of her. There was a small puddle on the floor.

A green, black, and yellow-ish blob was there then, and a loud gasp came from it. "Oh my stars..."

A blue and black blob separated from the green blob and came closer to her. "Jasper."

 _Lapis..._

"Jasper, we're here now, Peridot thinks..." there was a pause. "...Peridot thinks the eggs are ready to come out."

 _Fantastic._

" You have to phase away your uniform." Lapis said.

 _Not while the nerd's here, I'm not!_

"Jasper, come on, you have to do it, or else they won't come out."

 _Fine._

She felt more pain.

"Do you need anything?"

"W-water!" she said, grabbing Lapis' hands.

"Peridot? Can you get her some water?"

"WE DON'T HAVE WATER!"

"WHY NOT!?"

"YOU WERE ORIGINALLY A PRISONER AND WE COULDN'T LET YOU USE WATER TO POSSIBLY ESCAPE!"

"THAT'S DUMB!"

"DON'T YOU HAVE WINGS SHE CAN DRINK?!"

"WHAT THE-SHE IS NOT DRINKING MY WINGS!"

All the while Jasper was continuing to rock in pain.

"Okay, Jasper...I'll need you to push." Peridot said. She was covering Lapis' mouth with her floating digits, and Lapis was making muffled sounds of anger.

Then Lapis got her mouth free. "You can do it, Jasper!"

Jasper took a deep breath and tried to push the eggs out.

And then there one was.

Lapis picked it up.

"Oh my stars..." Peridot whispered.

"You really did it..." Lapis said, squeezing Jasper's hand.

Jasper smiled weakly.

"There's still more." Peridot pointed out.

Lapis kissed Jasper's forehead. "You can do it."

And because of those words, Jasper knew she could...

…

…

After all the eggs were out, Peridot went back to what she was doing before Lapis got her, leaving them with a small bit of advice: to put the eggs in a basket and for them to rest.

So that's what they did.

"Jasper?"

"Hm."

"Let's never have gemlings again."

"I agree. Or at least, if we do, make YOU have them."

Lapis playfully punched Jasper in the arm." No, I don't think so."

Jasper closed her eyes and wound an arm around Lapis' waist, pulling her closer. "I love you."

Lapis laughed softly. "Big Baby."

"I'm not a big baby."

"Yeah you are..." Lapis kissed her forehead. "You're MY Big Baby."

"Fantastic."

"I know."

"I hope the gemlings will be happy."

"They will be."

"Are you sure?" asked Jasper.

Lapis kissed her softly then. "I'm sure."


	15. Too Much Mistletoe? (NSFW!)

**High School AU! But also...NSFW? Sort of...but again they get interrupted WTF is up with this**

 **So I guess be old enough to read this content..?**

 **I don't know why am I writing these warnings I never pay attention to them myself XD**

 **Hope you like this :3**

 **Too Much Mistletoe?**

Lapis and Jasper were Just Friends.

They were nothing else, despite what happened on the 24th of December.

Not everyone celebrated Christmas, and Jasper could respect that...but she still invited some of her friends over on Christmas Eve.

Of course, her parents were out at their own adult party, so the house was completely free.

That was both perfect and horrible at the same time.

Because if some adults had been there, nothing would have gone wrong.

Lapis and Jasper wouldn't have done the thing that made them so embarassed around each other.

Peridot and Amethyst wouldn't have cracked a window and made a sloppy fruity mess.

And Garnet wouldn't have done nothing.

…

…

"Alright, guys, thanks for coming, blah blah blah, anything else have to say, the end." Jasper said, clapping her hands. "Go nuts."

They certainly went nuts, alright.

As soon as Jasper finished her sentence, Peridot had started cutting up fruit for some weird smoothie concoction.

Then Amethyst turned on football and threw beer at everyone.

And Garnet started doing nothing.

But there was one person she couldn't find: Lapis.

She couldn't have left...could she?

"Lapis?" she yelled, walking through the enormous house.

"Lapis?"

Suddenly she heard crying from inside her room.

"Lapis?"

The crying stopped and there was a slight pause before the door opened.

"I'm sorry, I-" then she saw Jasper. "O-oh. It's you." She gestured to the mistletoe all around Jasper's room."It's pretty in there."

"Thanks...why were you crying?" Jasper asked, leaning against the wall.

Lapis tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Jasper thought she saw a faint blush on her cheeks. "Oh. Well, I…"

"Do you just sit around and cry all the time?" Jasper joked.

But Lapis' eyes widened in fear. "How-how did YOU know that?!"

 _Huh?_

"Oh..." Jasper trailed off.

"Depression."

Jasper blushed. "I'm sorry...I didn't know."

Lapis gestured to the mistletoe. "And it's all because of that."

Jasper raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

Lapis looked down at her feet and sat down on Jasper's bed. "Couples are supposed to kiss under mistletoe."

Jasper gestured for her to keep going.

"...And I'm...not with anyone...!" A tear trickled down Lapis face.

Jasper flicked the tear off with her finger. "Well, nor am I..." She sat down next to Lapis.

Lapis blushed at her close proximity and started to scootch away, but Jasper moved closer.

Lapis could feel Jasper's breath on her lips.

Were both their lips parting?

"You can be with someone now, Waterworks." Jasper said quietly.

And then their lips met.

Neither of them knew how it had happened...one moment they were talking normally, and then they were kissing?

Jasper moved her hands to Lapis' chest and cupped her right breast through her clothes, and Lapis bit back a small moan, bringing her hands to her mouth so as to not let the noise escape.

"Aw, c'mon, Lil' L, why're you holding in your pretty voice?" Jasper mumbled against the skin on Lapis' neck before biting down, sucking a hickey in her neck.

Lapis' teeth chattered and she hissed, closing her eyes.

"Did God make this body just for me?" teased the larger girl, rubbing generous meticulous circles on the crotch of Lapis' black jeans.

"Stoooop..." Lapis said, trying to push Jasper's greedy hands away, despite the fact that she really wanted more of that deep petting.

"No, I don't think so..!" Jasper rubbed the dark spots on Lapis' neck with her thumb and relished the fact that Lapis was now shivering.

Lapis lifted her back and legs off the bed as Jasper began to take her clothes off.

And then she stopped her when she unzipped the zippeer of her jeans.

"Wait!"

"What?" asked Jasper, clearly annoyed.

"I-uh..." Lapis squeezed her eyes shut."…just don't laugh."

Jasper pulled her pants down and looked. She didn't laugh, despite the fact that they had Dora the Explorer on the article of clothing underneath.

"Did you make all this for me?" asked Jasper, staring between Lapis' legs at her burning core. She swiped a finger inside quickly then licked Lapis' fluid off her fingers."Thanks, Lapis, don't think I've tasted anything this good since that time I ate raw vienna sausages."

"E-ew!" Lapis managed to yelp, before Jasper picked up Lapis with ease and set her on her face.

Lapis bit back another moan and shakily shifted to get more comfortable.

Just as she felt the strange sensation that announced her orgasm, Amethyst barged in, drop-dead drunk, and threw Peridot's blender out of the closed bedroom window, laughing.

Then she took a double take.

And she saw Lapis, naked, sitting on Jasper's face like it was her throne.

"Oops. Sorry, dudes." she said, swaggering back out of the room.

Lapis stood up and put her clothes back on. She coughed."I guess I should be going now."

"Merry Christmas, Lapis."

"Happy…winter holiday, Jasper."

Amd Lapis walked out of the door, leaving Jasper behind.

Jasper looked around, thinking that maybe one shouldn't put so much mistletoe in one place at a time.


	16. Binge-Watch Wednesday

**Binge-watch Wednesday**

Crime shows are always the worst shows, because they're always so predictable. I want to kill myself for choosing one to binge-watch during 'Binge-Watch Wednesday'.

"BOO!" yells Lapis, throwing a piece of popcorn at the TV. "Could you be EVEN MORE obvious?"

"Can we PLEEEEEEAAAAAASSSSEEEE watch something else?" moans my room mate, Amethyst,"THIS SHOW IS FUCKING TORTURING ME."

"Sure, fine, what ELSE would you want to watch?" I ask, flipping through the channels.

"Something that doesn't have porn in it for once?" offers Lapis, laughing. I shoot her a glare.

"Lapis, I don't force you into porn every ti-"

"Yes you do." she whispers.

Amethyst shrugs."Welp, if you're gonna fucking pick something, hurry up. I'm dead and bored."

"Shut up, runt. I'm looking."

I settle on a random movie. Movies are't really things you can binge-watch...but since they're _so fucking desperate_ for entertainment, it's _something._

"Oh hey, it's that one movie Pearl and I went to watch that one time." Amethyst says, snatching the bowl of popcorn away from Lapis.

"Okay, OKAY! Neither of us want to hear about your gayness!" Lapis and I say at practically the same time.

Lapis snickers. "Because only OUR gayness matters!" Her eyes flick to me and she smirks.

"SERIOUSLY? Come on, Lapis, that was so corny!"

She sticks out her tongue.

"No, don't stick your tongue out at me!" I yell, standing up from my spot on the floor. "And why are YOU sitting on the couch and not me?"

"You want me to sit on you?" she asks inncently.

"NO! I said..." I trail off as I realize what I said. "Shit."

And then she plops herself in my lap. "There, Jasper, you got what you wanted."

I can't help but laugh. "Yeah, okay, Lil' L." I say, wrapping my arms around her.

And, to be honest...maybe I actually DO like it better this way.


	17. Not Gay AT ALL

**Not Gay AT ALL  
**

Just Friends.

That was all we were.

Friends and nothing else.

But nobody believed it at all.

Okay, so maybe friends didn't hug each other as much as Lapis and I did. So what?

Just because we hug doesn't mean we're going out.

And I'm NOT gay. I'm not gay AT ALL, one-hundred percent hetero. I think. And Lapis, I know, is the same as me.

We had known each other for a while, maybe since about fourth grade.

She was new, and her seat was right next to mine. She was a runty thing, short, messy black hair, regular-looking. Didn't look like she went outside much. And my friends decided it would be fun to start picking on her...that ended up with me beating them up AND me being in the principal's office.

Because fuck them, I thought she was PRETTY.

Not in a gay way, though.

And then she started talking to me.

And it felt good to finally have a friend like her.

And she must've felt the same way as me, because she became more open with explaining her insecurities and problems with me. I would always jokingly say that whatever the problem was, I'd beat it up with brute strength. And she would laugh at that.

Then we were seperated during high school. She was sent to some snobby private school on the other side of the state, while I was stuck at home with some weird nerd that was supposed to be a stand-in for Lapis: Peridot.

But Peridot never really replaced Lapis. Peridot was a weird nerd that didn't get any of my jokes, would always tell me to stop punching things and getting into fights, and always told me what I WAS and WASN'T supposed to do in class, while Lapis was the complete opposite. Lapis was fun.

She was my best friend.

And then we finally saw each other again in person on the second day of freshman year (in college, ha)...it turned out that her dorm was right across the hall from mine!

Ever since then, everyone has been saying that we are dating, because we've become inseperable again.

But I noticed one thing that hadn't been there before: there were bags under her eyes, like she had gone a year without sleep. Her hair had been dyed dark blue, like the gem she was named after...but she had texted me a picture of it weeks before that day. But then she had more manners, and was quiet a lot of the time.

She'd...changed.

But still, she was fun to hang out with.

Sometimes, she would experiment with different colors of hair dye on her hair and show me. She would tell me to pose and she would paint me. She would even sometimes take me to the pool to watch her swim meets.

It was still Lapis, despite everything.

And I was able to see her finally, after all those years...

...I wasn't going to ruin it.

 **I hope you guys liked this...you might recognize this as the former first chapter of 'This Side of the Hall'.**

 **-JGD**


	18. Go Ahead And Cry

**Again, if you have any requests, tell me in a PM or in the reviews :3**

 **Haha, fun fact about the last one: that's how my relationship with my crush is...except I DO have a crush on her.**

 **Haha let's stop now.**

 **Anyway, this is that weird Gem AU where they go to school and crap like regular humans, but they're still gems with colorful skin and gems and powers. Get it? I hope so...also, gems need to breathe in this...they had to, for this oneshot to work.**

 **Go Ahead And Cry**

Lapis Lazuli had done something horrible.

Worse than beating someone up.

Worse than yelling at a poodle.

 _She had tried to drown someone._

The gem she had tried to drown's name was Peridot. Peridot was a big green nerd with circular Harry-Potter-esque glasses, who just so happened to have a humungous crush on her.

And that morning, by the pool, she had started flirting with her, apparently forgetting _one_ important fact: Lapis was already dating Jasper, a big orange quartz that could snap a humans' neck as easily as she could snap a pencil.

And Lapis, who was steadily getting angrier by the minute, didn't notice as the water in the pool started to rise and curl into chains.

Then they pulled Peridot under the water in one clean move.

"LAPIS!"

A yell from the life guard, Pearl, brought her back to Earth. For a moment, she was debating leaving the green gem under the surface of the water, but then thought better of it.

As soon as the pool water dropped Peridot on the side of the pool, Lapis bolted.

…

…

 _Knock knock._

"Hey Sardonyx, I thought I said I wasn't interested…" came the voice of Jasper's room mate, Amethyst, from inside. A second later, the door opened, and purple eyes were staring into Lapis' blue ones. "Oh, it's you."

"Jasper…?" gasped Lapis.

"She's in her room."

The purple gem let Lapis through, and Lapis walked stiffly in the direction of Jasper's room.

Jasper's door was open, and there Jasper was herelf, sitting on her bed, tossing an anvil from hand to hand as if it was a softball. She looked up at Lapis. She grinned."Hey, Lapis!"

Lapis bit her lip and walked in, choking out a small "Hello, Jasper" before sitting down on the floor in front of the orange gems' bed.

"What's wrong?" Jasper asked, her face immediately falling. She set the anvil down next to her.

Lapis' eyes swum. She couldn't speak now...Jasper would probably hate her if she heard what Lapis had done. She fell into Jasper's open arms and started crying like a baby.

"Hey, brat, what's wrong?"

Lapis whispered,"Nothing," before more tears came, cutting off her words.

"Go ahead and cry if you need to, Lil' Lappy." Jasper said, pressing a small kiss to her forehead, hugging the blue gem closer to her.

…

…

"It was for you..."

"Lapis, I-"

"Yeah, I know, you think I'm a violent twit and you hate me. I know."

Jasper shook her head." What are you talking about? Everyone feels that way sometimes. If someone's making you uncomfortable, you just...don't get all worked up about it."

Lapis chuckled."Thanks for not hating me..."

"Lapis," Jasper said, unamused,"stop being so paranoid about me hating you. I'm just like you...worse, even."

"I'm worse."

"I'm worse than you."

"I suck at life, Jasper."

"So do I, Lapis...so do we all."

"I love you."

"But I fell for you a lot worse, baby...can you kiss my wounds better now?"

"Shut up."

"Aw, did I make you...CWYYYY?" Jasper said in a baby-ish voice.

"You're about to." said Lapis, crossing her arms.

But the kissed anyway, and the tears evaporated from the blanket and formed a perfect heart behind them.

 **Had to re-upload because of some spelling errors.**

 **Also, this one also kinda relates to my life too...I had a girlfriend, and this guy was trying to flirt with me...I didn't like this person but put up with his awful pickup lines for a few minutes before I blew over.**

 **Sorry, if you guys didn't like this chapter :3**

 **-Jasper the Gay Dream**


	19. To Love A Gem

**XD, okay, sorry for deleting This Side of the Hall, did NOT like where THAT fic was going.**

 **Anyway, my friend KillJoyGem requested GEM Jaspis hurt/comfort, so I suppose I'll be writing that now...I'm probably going to end up crying during this and ruining it...that's why I don't usually write hurt/comfort XD**

 **We'll miss you, Carrie Fisher (as Princess Leia in Star Wars) :(**

 **To Love a Gem**

Everyone thought it was impossible to heal a corrupted gem...

...however, in Jasper's case, that was very much ppossible, as she had been cured for quite some time, and had been redeemed by everyone...

...except Lapis.

Lapis didn't even know Jasper had corrupted in the first place, so how were they supposed to break the news to her? Say," _Hey, we've healed your former fuion partner from her corruption and oh yeah she corrupted a few months ago,"_?

NO.

Jasper had actually been asking to see her for quite some time, so they finally let her go to the barn, under the supervision of Steven and Amethyst.

…

It was Peridot who had opened the door.

"Oh, Steven, Amethyst! I see you brought..." Then Peridot trailed off when she saw Jasper. Her face darkened. "J-jasper..."

Jasper crossed her arms."What?"

Peridot looked nervously behind her and beckoned Steven and Amethyst inside, before slamming the door in Jasper's face.

 _WHAT!?_

 _NO!_

Jasper pounded angrily on the door."YOU GET BACK OUT HERE!" she yelled, raising her fist to punch it in. "TAKE ME TO LAPIS!"

But the door opened right then, and Jasper's fist met air. She narrowed her yellow eyes and looked down, about to snarl an angry comment, before she saw her.

Lapis.

In front of her.

Her eyes wide with surprise.

She whispered,"It-it really is y-you!" before collapsing in tears.

…

Jasper had no idea what made her do so. Had corruption made her unrecognizable? No, that wasn't right. Was she scary? Was Lapis...scared of her?

"Lapis-"

"WHY DID YOU COME HERE!?" yelled Lapis, face dark blue, eyes filled to the brim with anger.

Or was it anger?

Jasper reached out a hand to support Lapis, but Lapis jumped back. "STAY AWAY FROM US-ME!"

Had Lapis just said 'us'?

"I DON'T WANT HER AGAIN!" Lapis choked out, before sinking to her knees. Her bangs covered her eyes as water began to rise behind her.

"Wait, LAPIS! That-that wasn't the reason I came here..." Jasper said, assuming Lapis meant Malachite. "I don't want Malachite either! I just...wanted to see you after all these-"

"You lie." Lapis whispered, the water behind her curling into chains. "You may've convinced Steven and Amethyst, but you'll never convince me..."

"Lapis, please hear me out." Jasper knealt down next to her.

"NO!" Lapis yelled, eyes uncovered as the watery chains moved quickly towards Jasper.

At the same time, Jasper crashed her lips against Lapis', mimicking the thing she had seen the ruby and the sapphire do,, and the water froze (not literally), hovering in midair.

Then it fell into a harmless puddle on the ground.

Jasper pulled away slowly, looking down at the blue gem.

Lapis' cries had quieted, but the tears still came faster.

"Lapis..." Jasper said sadly.

"I-I was horrible to you...we were h-horrible to us..." Lapis whispered, voice broken. "It was horrible...I-I liked i-it..."

"Lapis, it's over now. The past is the past."

"NO!" Lapis yelled suddenly. "IT WILL NEVER STOP WITH YOU! B-because J-Jaspers don't stop un-until...they GET WHAT THEY WANT!"

"Lapis..."

"I w-won't listen..."

"Lapis, Pink Diamond was shattered, and I definitely wanted her back...and when I realized it was pointless, I stopped trying to get her back. Getting Malachite back isn't going to happen."

"I don't believe you." Lapis sniffed, liked a small three-year-old after a tantrum.

"You don't have to."

They sat in silence for a while, Jasper watching a butterfly flitter from one plant to the next.

Then Lapis started crying again. "I'm sorry..." she whispered, throwing her arms around Jasper.

Jasper didn't know exactly what was going on, but sat still, letting Lapis hug her.

Slowly, her crying stopped, though Jasper couldn't comprehend why.

 **NO idea what happened there...oh well.**


	20. Clock Strikes Twelve

**This is in honor of the new year!**

 **Oh yeah, Happy New Year, everyone!**

 **Clock Strikes Twelve**

It was an hour before midnight, and Lapis and Jasper were curled up in their bed, watching a Dogcopter movie marathon.

That's what it always was: cuddling until the last few seconds of midnight, then counting down, then the kiss at the strike of twelve, then more cuddling.

The old heater in their room buzzed, and occasionally, the old TV would crackle and all that would show up was static, but otherwise the room was completely cozy and quiet enough to be tolerable.

"What time is it?" Lapis asked, trying to look at the nightstand, where the clock radio was sitting.

Jasper turned over and looked for her. "11:06. Twenty minutes after you aaked me the last time, brat. Are you SURE you don't want me to put the clock between us?"

"Nooo!" Lapis whined, tightening her hold on Jasper.

Jasper chuckled.

…

It was thirty minutes until midnight.

Lapis and Jasper had completely given up on the movie marathon.

The TV buzzed with static in the background as they started talking to each other about New Year's resolutions, having a child, and the past year.

"My New Year's resolution is to try to actually fulfill my New Year's resolutions." Jasper said, combing through Lapis' blue hair with her fingers.

"Well, I never make them anyway." Lapis snickered.

…

Fifteen minutes left before 2016 officially ended.

Jasper and Lapis continued the talk about whether they should either adopt or have a child.

Then, Lapis gasped. "OH, JASPER, WHAT TIME IS IT!?"

Jasper looked at the clock. "11:45."

"WHY DOES TIME GO BY SO FAST!?"

…

"FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE!" Jasper yelled along with the person on the TV.

"HAPPY NEW YEAR!" They yelled it together, afterwards kissing each other passionately.

…

The moments after were the finest. Jasper felt a sudden drowsiness, now that 12:00 AM had come and gone.

She had laid back in the bed, laying down, for the first time that night, and Lapis followed, laying her head on Jasper's chest, smalll arms curling around her.

Slowly, the couple fell asleep...

...it was going to be a good year.

 **Sorry this was so short, guys, I am frickin' tired however, as it is currently 2:33 AM.**

 **also, jasper at the end of this fic is based on how I feel right now XD**

 **Happy New Year, everyone!**


	21. Don't Unleash The Beast

**This is inspired by the feeling I get whenever I get really angry. Like everything is cold, and a shadow envelopes me.**

 **I may have anger issues..?**

 **XD sorry, totally irrelevant**

 **hey did i mention I like werewolves guys**

 **-JGD**

 **Don't Unleash the Beast**

 _Was that supposed to happen?_

All Jasper could hear was her own voice in her head, and the pounding of her heart.

All she could see was blackness, and her own form., which seemed to be glowing.

 _Where am I?_

And then, the darkness was shot through with tiny bloodred lights. At the same time, her ears started to ring, making loud noises like microphone feedback.

And she was snapped back into reality. "JASPER!" someone yelled.

Footsteps.

A tan face surrounded by dark blue hair was looking down at her.

 _Down?_

Jasper then was aware of the school's linoleum floor underneath her.

"Jasper, are you alright?"

"Lapis, I'm fine." rumbled Jasper, standing up and brushing herself off.

Lapis still looked nervous, but entwined her hand with Jasper's anyway.

She didn't seem to notice the long claws that had started to form on Jasper's fingers.

…

It was only a few hours later until Jasper noticed them. _What the-uh oh..._ She knew what that meant. _Full moon already?_

Lapis was the only one to notice how antsy Jasper was being.

And she was the only one who knew why.

 _Please, no one can make her angry today...no one._

Jasper was a werewolf, one of the last. Her transformation started early in the day before the full moon, and she was 100% guaranteed to accidentally lash out at anyone who annoyed her.

Lapis knew, and she was there to make sure that no one was bitten, scratched, or disemboweled.

Although, as usual, it was probably going to happen anyway.

"Jasper," she asked, noticing how Jasper was hiding her hands,"do you need to go home?"

Jasper narrowed her eyes at Lapis. "I'm FINE, Lapis, calm down."

…

Jasper felt the layer of sweat that had showed up on her upper lip and brought the sleeve of her jacket to her mouth to wipe it off. It was little things like these that usually initiated the teasing comments of unsuspecting students. Even though Lapis was there to cool things down if they heated up, Jasper still was worried. She had lost control once that day already...she didn't want to again.

A drop of sweat made its way down the side of her face. She buried her face in her hands and let out an inhuman whimper.

Lapis placed a small hand on her shoulder and smiled sadly at her. "Does it hurt?"

Jasper nodded.

Lapis turned around to face the other way, but not before Jasper thought she saw a small tear running down her girlfriend's face.

…

When the last bell rang, it was almost heaven to both Jasper and Lapis.

They ran out of the school into the cool afternoon air. Jasper's eyes had started to change from their regular brown color to a beautiful amber-gold. Lapis immediately saw Jasper starting to bend over to walk on all fours, and she scolded her,"NOT YET, Jasper, wait until you're home!"

Jasper whimpered again, but stood up, shakily walking on two feet.

"I'm sorry, Jasper, we just don't want anyone to see you..."

Jasper felt the shadow consume her heart again, and felt her blood run cold. She turned on Lapis, eyes wild. Lapis gasped. "SEE ME FOR WHO I AM!?" she yelled, clenching her fists.

"Jasper-jasper, calm down..." Lapis said, digging in her jacket pocket for something, while continuing to back away.

And then water sprayed Jasper's face from the squirt bottle aimed at her, and the darkness dissipated again. She smiled sheepishly at Lapis with glowing white fangs. "Sorry."

Lapis nodded, putting the squirt bottle back in her pocket. "I know."

…

As usual, Jasper's parents had left the house. They always did before the full moon. They had no idea on how to handle their daughter.

Jasper was laying on her bed, staring straight at the ceiling. The pain hadn't fully started yet, there were only small twinges every now and then.

Lapis was there as well, squirt bottle on the table next to her. The windows were locked, blinds down, curtains pulled. The door was locked as well. Jasper couldn't see it, but she knew there was a tranquilizer gun somewhere.

And then, at 7:00 sharp, the pain started.

Lapis knew it had, by Jasper's hyperventilating and occasional whimpers. She pulled the tranquilizer gun from her pocket and laid it on the table next to her as well, as she watched her girlfriend start to change. She knew Jasper would be in more pain than usual. The full changes didn't start till late usually, and she was always done at 12:00 midnight. That was a well-known fact.

 _So why did she start early this time?_

Fur started slowly growing on Jasper's face, arms, hands, and legs.

…

It was 10:00 PM, and Jasper had stopped changing.

She was a wolf. A beautiful one at that, with golden eyes with kohl black centers and reddish-orange fur, her face accented with white. She was as muscular as she was when she was a human.

Lapis was concerned. This had never happened before. She had known Jasper since she had been bitten by Lapis' father while they were in New York City for New Year's.

Heck, this hadn't even happened with her parents before, and maybe even _ever._

But Jasper hadn't tried to attack her yet...that was new. In fact, she had jumped off her bed, landing heavily on the floor, and padded over to Lapis, nuzzling into her hand.

Lapis stared down at Jasper, whose gold eyes were fixated on her. The blue-haired girl chuckled, petting Jasper softly. She pressed a kiss to the wolf's brownish-orange nose, and Jasper started licking her face like a domesticated dog. _That_ was _definitely_ new.

Lapis smiled. She started to scratch Jasper's stomach, and Jasper didn't whine.

Then she whispered in the wolf's ear,"Bite me."

Jasper immediately stopped. She looked into Lapis' eyes questioningly, searching for an explanation. Then her eyes narrowed. "Why?" she growled.

Lapis frowned. "I-I want to be like you."

Jasper shook her head hard.

"Yes, I do. Jasper, it doesn't feel fair to me that you're going through all this pain, and I'm not."

"We all only get what we deserve, Lapis."

"BITE ME, Jasper. Please." Lapis pleaded. "We can get Peridot to help us...she knows!"

Jasper sighed. She opened her mouth around Lapis' arm, and hesitantly clamped it shut.

…

Two howling wolves were at the Brook's residence that night. One orange, one greyish-blue.

They were curled up together on the orange one's bed.

The orange one was there because it was her home, and she couldn't be allowed to run free.

The grey-blue one was there only because of love.

 **IDK what the heck just happened, but I just wrote my longest chapter ever.**

 **Again, if you have requests, I'll be happy to write them!**

 **-JGD**


	22. Fireflies

**I love fireflies...**

 **Fireflies**

That summer night couldn't have been more perfect.

The stars were out in the deep navy of the night sky, the light of the waxing gibbous moon lighting up the area brightly.

It was on these nights when Lapis and Jasper would go to the old field in their backyard to stargaze under the weeping willow, the distant sounds of waves crashing against the shores of a distant beach. There was a fain breeze, which cooled the warm air to a tolerable temperature. The mosquitoes were gone, they always left after dark. Instead, the fireflies were there.

Jasper rose from her spot on the old blue quilt they used to stargaze as she saw the first flashing lights of one. Gently cupping her hands, she closed them around the insect, bringing it to Lapis to hold.

Lapis smiled at Jasper and let the insect crawl onto her own hand. "What do we name it?" she asked quietly.

"Name it something yellow."

"Sun? Citrine? Your Eyes?" Lapis asked, tapping her chin.

Jasper chuckled. "Well, whatever it's name is, it seems like it wants to leave your hand."

"Only male fireflies fly."

"But I bet if a girl tried, she could beat a guy in a race." Jasper said, laying back down next to Lapis as the firefly flew off.

"Mm." Lapis murmured in agreement.

They watched more fireflies fly above them, silently, listening, seeing, and feeling.

It was on nights like this that they hardly needed to talk at all.

It was on nights like this that the fireflies did all the talking for them.


	23. Netflix and Chill(NSFW!)

**I KNOW you guys want a Werewolf!Jaspis story, and I will publish it soon...I'm still workng on the first chapter XD**

 **Summary:: Lapis comes over for Netflix and Chill, Jaspis gets in a fight about an anime, Lapis bites Jasper, afterwards making stupid sex joke, and then they…well, you get the point.**

 **Anyway, I LOVE Netflix and Chill stories...and also spaghetti, but that's not even related to the subject(if you love spaghetti you are now my BFF)...so here are these stupid warnings that I never obey:**

 **NSFW! NSFW! Please be 18+ or mature nough to handle these situations! YAYYY!**

 **Netflix And Chill (NSFW!)**

It was all Jasper's sister's fault that Lapis Lazuli had to deal with this.

"Netflix and Chill" was a thing Jasper had recently gotten obsessed with, and just the idea of laying around watching TV made Lapis absolutely SICK. If they were going to be together, why couldn't they just fuck each other?

So that was why Lapis had almost thrown up after her phone call with Jasper...she had (obviously) asked if Lapis could come over for it.

And she had _agreed_ to it.

Lapis showed up at Jasper's around 9 PM, wearing black gym shorts, a blue swim team shirt, and a ginormous frown. However, Jasper seemed oblivious to it and greeted her with her usual charming smirk.

"Lapis," she said, arms crossed."I can't believe you actually came!"

Lapis forced a smile. "Haha, yes." She rubbed her arm awkwardly.

Jasper cleared her throat, breaking the awkward silence."Anyway. Come in."

Lapis walked in behind Jasper and looked around. She hadn't been cleanliness, as Jasper was usually known for having gym clothes thrown everywhere. Lapis had once found a pair of socks in the microwave...that was a VERY unpleasant experience. However, this time, Jasper's apartment was completely clean. And on the table, instead of bills and unread junk mail, there were two plates of spaghetti, the red sauce artfully drizzled on top, with a sprig of parsley on top of each one. A basket of garlic bread was in the center of the table. Lapis' mouth started to water.

"Sit down." Jasper ordered, though still keeping a kind-ish tone. She pulled out the chair for Lapis and let her sit down before scooting it back in and grabbing something from the refrigerator. Lapis cold hear two glasses being filled with...something.

"Jasper, what are you doing?"

"Here. I want you to guess what's in the glass."

"Vodka. Come on, Jasper, you can't trick me when it comes to alcohol." Lapis snickered, taking a long sip from the glass as it was set next to her.

"Dammit." hissed Jasper under her breath.

Lapis smirked. "Nice job cleaning, by the way." She looked from side to side as though someone might've been listening, then leaned closer to Jasper,"And the spaghetti smells good. I hope it tastes as good as you do."

Jasper turned bright red and mumbled something under her breath, then face-palmed. "Don't start."

Lapis laughed. Maybe tonight wouldn't be so bad.

…

Later, when they finished the spaghetti, Jasper had finally turned on the TV.

"Do you wanna actually watch Netflix or just regular TV?"

"Netflix." Lapis said, sitting down on the white leather couch. The couch was usually ANOTHER thing that was always covered in magazines and clothes, but Jasper had cleaned it off too, and there wasn't a speck of dirt anywhere on it. The blue-haired girl, content with this, scooted as close to Jasper as she could get. Jasper slung an arm around Lapis' shoulders to get her even closer.

"What do you want to watch?" Jasper asked, hand still on the remote. "And I don't want to watch any of that ridiculous...animoo...that you and Peridot watch."

"ANIME." Lapis corrected.

"KISS MY ASS."

"Fine. How about that one movie where the dog dies?"

"Oh my God, okay, we can watch your dumb animals!" Jasper growled.

"ANIMES!"

"WHATEVER!"

"Okay, so there's this really good one called _Yuri! On Ice_ that you might like..." Lapis began, snatching the remote from Jasper.

…

After a few more arguments on whether YurioXYuri is a good ship or not (Lapis was winning, being the one saying 'not'), Lapis and Jasper had finally decided to watch something else.

"No more animoo." Jasper hissed."I don't want to be reduced into some pathetic fangirl again."

"So I'm pathetic?" Lapis whispered, genuinely hurt.

"W-wait, th-that's not what I meant-"

"It better not have been."

Jasper sighed. "Okay, I-admit, that's kind of what I meant..."

Lapis jumped up angrily, fists clenched. She glared at Jasper, eyes burning.

"Whoa, Lapis, chill…"

"NO, YURI!"

"WHAT THE FUCK!? That's not even my name!" roared Jasper, standing up in front of Lapis. "LOOK AT WHAT ANIME DOES TO YOU!"

"That's it, I'm going."

"So you're just going to get mad at me over some stupid show about ice skating. Real mature, Lapis." Jasper muttered.

Lapis growled. "What's even less mature is never cleaning your apartment."

"WHAT!?"

Lapis struggled in Jasper's grasp, but seeing as that didn't work, she ended up biting the other woman's arm.

"Son of a bitch!" Jasper dropped Lapis, and stared at the bite mark on her arm. "You bit me!"

An enormous shit-eating grin spread across Lapis' face, a rarity for her."Oh, but Jaspy, I thought you LIKE it when I bite you..!"

Jasper's gold eyes widened and she immediately turned bright red, beads of sweat forming on her face. She tugged at the collar of her black Metallica sweatshirt nervously.

"Oh, do you still have those gifts I gave you last week?" Lapis whispered innocently in Jasper's ear, afterwards biting the sensitive shell. Jasper froze up, her eyes squeezing shut, and her teeth gritted.

"St-stop it, b-brat…" she hissed, backing further into the couch cushions.

Lapis shook her head. "Lemme see them."

Jasper shook her head, face still red, and hugged her knees to her chest. "Lapis, PLEASE, not right NOW!"

Lapis pulled down the collar of Jasper's sweatshirt and stared at the dark bruises there. "So you DO."

Jasper, embarassed, nodded, biting her lip."Y-yes..." She knew what was going to come next.

And came it did.

Lapis harshly tugged on Jasper's arms, raising them above her head. Then, she took off Jasper's sweatshirt, bringing her hand up to one of the larger woman's breasts and kneading them gently, looking directly into Jasper's gold eyes.

Jasper had her lip caught between her teeth, and small gasps escaped. "L-lap-brat-"

"What?" Lapis asked, smirking. She moved her hands away from Jasper's chest and cupped her face.

Jasper squeezed her eyes shut. "Y-you-BRAT!" She pushed Lapis off of her and hugged her arms to her chest, hiding it from Lapis. She was still bright red.

"What're you going to do about it?"

Jasper let out an angry growl, and stood up, grabbing Lapis by the arm and shoving her on the couch. "You're wrong if you think you can win." she hissed through her teeth. She pulled down Lapis' shorts before the blue-haired girl could do anything and hooked her fingers into Lapis' panties, rubbing her sex back and forth.

"Jasper, what th-FUCK..." Lapis yelled as Jasper pulled down her panties and started to suck on her clit. She fisted Jasper's hair and let out a breathy moan.

"Ha." Jasper laughed, moving her head away. "Told you you wouldn't win."

"Win what?" Lapis whined, trying to shove Jasper's head back between her legs.

"Sex is a battle, Lapis...one I will always win. The first one who moans the other's name loses, I thought we decided that." Jasper smoothed Lapis' blue bangs away from her face.

Lapis frowned. "Sex is just another game to you, is it?"

Jasper nodded.

"Can't have a game without toys, then..."

Jasper shook her head. "No toys." She brought her hand to Lapis' crotch and rubbed her clit, staring at the other the entire time, a smirk on her face. Lapis shivered, hissing through her teeth, and closed her eyes.

"Jasper...don't tease."

"You're going to lose if I do." Jasper chuckled. Then suddenly, Lapis wasn't between her elbows on the couch anymore. "Lapis..?!"

Suddenly, Jasper felt cold hands on her back, massaging it gently. She gritted her teeth and growled in frustration. However, when she reached a hand behind her back to swipe at Lapis, the girl was gone. "Lapis!?"

Lapis didn't answer. Of course she didn't. She never did.

Then, Jasper felt cold air against her upper thighs. She looked down. "Shit." she breathed out angrily, rolling her eyes.

"Oops." Lapis trilled from behind her. Jasper turned around, gold eyes glowing with anger. She breathed in slowly through her nose.

"Lapis Lazuli," she whispered,"you are the MOST IMMATURE WOMAN I HAVE EVER FUCKED." She reached over the coffee table and snatched Lapis up by her wrists. "However, I must admit that I love that about you."

And with that, Jasper's eyes slid shut, and she kissed the small blue-haired girl, her anger fading.

"Mine." Lapis whispered, reaching behind Jasper and gripping the other's ass posessively.

Jasper chuckled. "Yours." She agreed, before kissing Lapis again.

…

They still hadn't finished their games at midnight.

Of course they hadn't; they always took a long time to finish. Jasper, despite how good Lapis was, was tough, and Lapis was almost always, no matter what Jasper did, on top.

However, Lapis HAD come once, and that was just because of watching Jasper, the big tough football player, go weak at the knees and cry.

So even though it was 12 AM, they were still staying in Jasper's room, going nuts.

And if they could, they would stay there forever.

 **WHAT HAPPENED TO ME OH MY GOSH**

 **sorry guys**

 **Also, I do NOT ship YurioXYuri.**

 **Watch Yuri! On Ice, it's a pretty good anime:)**

 **-JGD :)**


End file.
